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Saturday, October 8, 2011

Why have we grown so soft?

I was on the phone talking to my dad the other day and we were reminiscing about when my grandparents and he came from Cuba. He was a 15 year old boy who had grown up with a silver spoon in his mouth. My dad at 15 was the first to leave the Island with his aunt and uncle(mandatory army service was being enforced with Fidel's army)went to highschool in Clevaland,OH and began working odd jobs in order to make money in order to live.
Once my grandparents fled Cuba (My grandfather who had graduated with a degree in law and had worked as a bank president up until Fidel entered power)began working as an odd jobs man at a grocery store. My grandmother (who was the superintendent of the private schools in her region) became the cleaning lady at an office building.
So you see they had a lot and were left with nothing yet worked and worked until they had enough to survive. They didn't wait for welfare to kick in,if they didn't work they didn't eat. There were times when my dad would run home with the paycheck and my grandmother would run out to buy enough to eat for the day. The reason why I bring this story up is because I see more and more people have become soft. I know that life has a way of having cruel twist. But how much more cruel can life's twist be than when someone who had it all looses EVERYTHING,Flees to a country in which they barely know the language and manage to work and make a better life for themselves.
I know the unemployment rate is off the charts but I see it daily even at my husband's restaurant. No one wants to work! There is such a need for workforce in this town but no one wants to work because everyone wants management positions. I can name you 10 different people we offered jobs after they lost theirs that refuse to work for us because unemployment was a lot better than gaining a paycheck at minimum wage.
My husband and I are far from rich, we make ends meet. Literally. There have been times when our business first started where we wondered how we were going to pay for things. There are times when we have an off month and wonder how we will be paying some of the bills including all the taxes put on us by our state/federal government. YET we work, I tutor,watch our money,and we do what we can to make it. We are far from perfect but we are making it.
It seems this soft mentality is being carried on to our youth. We live in a college town and the other day I was paying for gas when out walks a few college kids with a six back in their hand one of them yelled out,don't worry about it's on my parents tonight! I mean really? I know kids will be kids and many have walked out just fine with that mentality but is that the way to behave when the economy is where it is? Maybe the kid has money but maybe just maybe like millions of Americans his parents are working and scrapping and saving to help their son go to college.
I'm just saying we've become soft as a society. I never thought I would say this but I agree with Obama when he said "America has grown soft" but I also blame him and most in power for allowing all these welfare programs to allow us to go soft.
When I taught school one of my last years teaching I got hired to work at a predominantly Mexican school. I was one of the only bilingual teachers in the district and was a natural shoe in for the position. I have to say It was one of the most disturbing times of my life. As you all well know (and if you don't) my mom is Mexican and I have/know many family,friends working out here from Mexico as Migrant farmers,undocumented workers, this is something that has touched me..however, I was disgusted at what I saw. Being half Mexican I had many of these parents/students come to me for help fill out paperwork in order to receive government assistance. Of courses over my dead body but until recently the State of Kansas didn't require proof of Citizenship in order to receive government aid including medical coverage. Which ironically all you need is a SS# in order to receive it at this point. I knew of many parents that were making double of what I was making working and were able to receive government help since they weren't "showing income" duh they were illegal and weren't able to "file taxes" point being their kids were growing up with a handout mentality as well. Many of these students yes work hard and go on to make better lives for themselves but the disturbing trend I saw was something that shouldn't be ignored.Even Cubans coming here from Cuba now have the same mentality. They know exactly where to go and what paperwork to fill out in order to recieve Goverment aid Then all they do is badmouth this country and talk about how good they had it in Cuba..ARGH!!!
We as a nation need to Buck up! There is crud going on but it's been going on for Centuries! Think Civil war,Dustbowl era, WW1,2 etc...Life is hard,we need to as a society grow some gull and begin acting like a society and take up responsibility for our own actions. Blaming others for not getting that job,or blaming the government isn't going to resolve anything. We are like the kid throwing a tantrum because they want a cookie,yet if the kid stopped yelling and got up and acted in an appropriate manner would then receive said cookie. America,you need to wake up and start living within your means,if that means we need to take away the play station and sell it on ebay or your kid has to "God forbid"wear clothes from Walmart then so be it. Whatever your decision stop the whining.


Jamiejo99 said...

I think a lot of people don't even make their kids get jobs when they are 16. We are going to. I learned alot about respect and doing a good job at that age. I am always almost surprised when I get a young person treat me like a customer should be treated, with a "have a nice day" or a friendly smile and the customer is always right attitude and help the customer or get someone who can kind of person. It's rare nowadays.

Our kids need to be taught to work and work hard for what they get and if anything, for that sense of pride of a job well done.

Homeschooling helps with the brand name thing, my kids don't even know brand names. We're not keeping up with anyone. Hopefully that will stay into adulthood.

Great post!! Your history is so interesting.

Here in MN, we give too many benefits. We have a ton of Somalians living here, living off the government, not working, because they can get they money. I never minded, until recently, it just doesn't seem fair. They are not like other immigrants, like your father and his family or from any other nationality really, they don't even try to fit in. The women are forbidden to even talk with another woman not of their religion. At least that's the impression I get.

OK, I got off topic....talked to much...

ConservamomE said...

It's terrible! I know everyone talks about taxing big companies but I think that's scapegoating a bigger problem. Where is that money going to go to? I know people hit on hard times but There is a blatant abuse of the system by so many!
Thank you! My heritage has made for interesting

Sandraseaman3476 said...

I love your website but most of all you are a Catholic Pro Life Mom with amazing common sense of what's going on in our country today. I think the root of the problem is parents that give too much to their kids out of guilt for not spending enough time with them and forget to teach the basics about surviving. I, was brought into this country when I was 12 (many years ago) and one great lesson my father taught me was to NEVER depend on government because if you do you become lazy and he was right. Thank you for your comment on my blog!

God Bless.

Sandra Seaman

ConservamomE said...

Thank you so much Sandra! I was born in this country but grew up with the same mentality because my parents were both Immigrants that had to work hard to get to where they were. Being an only child I was always expected to hold up my end of the bargain,by working hard, getting good grades and being a good,moral person. My parents were adamant about it. We are living in such trying times and we must all hold together strong in voices and prayers we are not a minority in thought there are many people who feel this way and we must be brave so that we can help our children grow up in a world better than the way we found it. :) Thank you for stopping by!

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"Never has the devil found such fertile territory upon which to work as in this era when his very existence is denied by so many" - St. Padre Pio